Evil Empire + Steroid Abuse = no rings this century

Well, as Gomer Pyle used to say "Surprise, Surprise, Surprise", the Mitchell report has finally come out, and guess who really stands out? - Roger "I tried to kill Mike Piazza", Clemens, man who loves himself almost as much as current Yankee standout A-Hole Rodriguez, but at least A-hole is honest. Roger... not so much. Roger was juicing up since 98, and looking at the stats when he left the Red Sox (a move I hated douchebag Dan Duquette for at the time, but perhaps the former Sox GM knew what he was talking about.) Roger finishes out his last 3 years in Boston with a record of 29-25. He heads to Toronto and it seems the miles on his arm have finally begun to catch up to him, yet magically he hits Canada and promptly drops back to back 20 win seasons, during the same period he begins to .. use ... roids! I guess that explains his Yankee career, and when you begin adding the other Roid fellas (David Justice, Chuck Knoblauch, , Ron Villone, Jason Giambi, Rondell White, AndyPettite, GlenAllen Hill, Mike Stanton, Kevin Brown, and the other dozen players who put on the pinstripes, it becomes the clear that the Bronx was truly pumped up to win games. So the empire spends a ton, cheats, and loses. Meanwhile the BoSox just win championships, 2 in our new century. How fucking sweet!!!

1994	Bos	24	24	3	1	170.2	124	62	54	15	71	168	9	7	0	0	--	2.85
1995	Bos	23	23	0	0	140.0	141	70	65	15	60	132	10	5	0	0	--	4.18
1996	Bos	34	34	6	2	242.2	216	106	98	19	106	257	10	13	0	0	--	3.64
1997	Tor	34	34	9	3	264.0	204	65	60	9	68	292	21	7	0	0	--	2.05
1998	Tor	33	33	5	3	234.2	169	78	69	11	88	271	20	6	0	0	--	2.65

Movie Review: Martin

I've recently been watching a good number of horror films. I was never a huge fan of horror while growing up, but much of that is because we didn't have cable until I was 11 or 12 and we didn't rent a lot of horror based films. As I got older I began to check out some more horror but I wanted to see a good film, not just a splatter fest. (I do recall staying at friends houses or visiting relatives who had cable and watching many of the slasher classics, things like Friday the Thirteenth, Halloween, and a very odd My Bloody Valentine - )

I cultivated my tastes and reached a point where I trust certain people's recommendations on movies, and I also know that a quality film can be made in any genre; the key is to know what is quality and what isn't: Martin is quality.

Martin was a very low-budget film made by George Romero, mostly known for his Night of the Living Dead movies. (Night of , Dawn of the Dead, Day of the Living Dead, and Land of the Dead. ) Night of the Living Dead is a genuine classic of cult cinema, using horror as a metaphor for the social unrest in our country, putting a disparate group of characters (black and white) in an isolated situation, unsure what has happened and terrified for their survival. Dawn of the Dead used the Zombie plight as a tongue in cheek indictment of our country's consumer culture, and is another example of the great films being done in the auteur dominated 70's. I have never seen Day of the Living Dead, and Land of the Dead was entertaining but didn't really resonate with me. (Although Dennis Hopper does get off a few sweet lines)

Martin is about a teenage boy who believes he is 84 years old and that he suffers from the curse of vampirism. His elderly uncle believe this also, and takes Martin in to live with him and his daughter, promising to take care of Martin's soul. That's it, that's the set up. Yet within this basic idea, Romero does a wonderful job utilizing the Pennsylvania landscape to create a drearly, isolated sense of existence. (Romero mentions in the documentary about the film that the town was an old mining town, and as the mills shut down the area became more dilapidated - he used that sense of a dying town for some great shots. ) The actors are all so real, genuine, and believable. The great Tom Savini is the only name actor I recognized. I will not reveal the twists in the plot, but this is a perfect example of what a passionate group of talented people can put together with a minimal budget but maximum incentive - Check it out.

Beast Out

Movie Review: Behind the Mask-The Rise of Leslie Vernon

It's always a rush when you watch a film that you know very little about, sort of an off the beaten path kind of film, and find yourself bowled over after watching the movie. Behind the Mask: The Rise of Leslie Vernon is one of those films. This was a Netflix rental that I threw on the PS2 in my upstairs attic at around 10 pm on Wednesday night. I figured I would get a feel for the flick, and would most likely watch a bit and then return to it on the weekend. The movie had other ideas. The actors were great, especially the leads, Nathan Baesal (Leslie Vernon), Robert Englund (yeah, Freddy, one of many entertaining additions to a film about an aspiring psycho slasher, providing that very tongue in cheek meta-fictional feel that I love). Of course, being the dude I am, I had to include a pic of the super talented and incredibly attractive, (in a very approachable type of persona) Angela Goethals.

As always, I refuse to lay down too much of the plot. The basic idea is Angela Goethals, playing a grad student documentary filmmaker named Taylor, shows up with her "crew" (2 guys for camera and sound) and visit with Leslie Vernon, who begins to show the crew his meticulous preparation in order to have a successful killing rampage. As a viewer, you find yourself completely engrossed but also confused as to exactly where all of this is going - trust me, it is well worth the trip the filmmaker and his cast take you on. Incredibly well acted, very clever without being obnoxious, this will be added to the DVD shelf without a second thought. It's rare that an unknown quantity makes that kind of jump for me, but this film is well worth it. Bonus is that the director/co-writer/producer of the film, Scott Glosserman, comes off as such a nice, cool guy to hang out with in the making of documentary included on the disc. Unlike Eli Roth, who often comes off as an obnoxious frat boy, Glosserman seems to be super positive, liked by his cast, and comfortable managing the chaos and stress of a smaller, indie film.

Highly, highly recommended!

Screw the Ravens

So the New England Patriots continue on their quest for a perfect football season, and beat the Ravens 27-24 last night. The Patriots beat the Ravens. Simple as that. What I absolutely love is that these professional athletes are whining and crying, bitching and moaning, and the reality is that the Ravens have demonstrated themselves to be an arrogant team of douchebags, led by king of the douchebags with head coach Brian Billick. Now I have to listen to Bart Scott , who lost his mind and cost his team 30 huge penalty yards prior to the last kickoff to the Ravens. Were these 30 yards part of the conspiracy, Bart? Is that why you tossed the flag into the stands. How about the bad timeout called by the def. coordinator for the Ravens? Part of the lack of accountability on this team. Best of all, the Ravens emotional leader is Ray "I got off a murder rap" Lewis only 7 years ago. Ray used his big bucks to hire great lawyers, frighten witnesses, and mysteriously his bloody white suit, along with the knives used to kill 2 innocents, all disappeared! Hmm, that is a conspiracy now.

PS, Samari Rolle, who cried about the ref calling him "boy" - Shut the Fuck Up. Clearly he was implying the racial undertones of this, and he also called out the official as having never played football. Hey, Samari, the ref said "just play ball, boy" a non-racial directive to worry about playing, not whining. The official was an african american, who played NFL football in the 70's and 80's . Wrong again, fool.

Beast out